Even Now

Sun – Moon

Spring – Winter

Day – Night

Joy – Pain

It’s all life. It’s all yours. It’s all good.

There’s not one without the other. No power in love without the possibility of losing it…

Someday…Someway..

Even when it’s too early and even when it doesn’t make sense and everything seems like insanity.

But, Father, how I long to never lose the gratitude of having loved. The gratitude of being loved.

Loved in a way that changed me. Completely.

The gratitude for regret that illuminates forgiveness. Of living and learning with another failable soul because it knits you together so tightly that you can’t tell where one starts and the other ends. Of dreaming and hoping and healing and moving forward, hand in hand, with hearts lifted to you. For years. For decades.

For what should have been longer

I don’t understand, Lord. I don’t know how I missed what you were saying. I thought we had a calling – together. I thought we were walking towards wholeness. But, maybe, it was a calling and wholeness of a kind I couldn’t fathom. What I know is that the moon makes the sun brighter. The winter makes the spring more beautiful. The night makes the day warmer. The pain makes the joy sweeter.

And I see it all too clearly now. How beautiful. How holy. How precious was this gift. This life. This love.

Too often we don’t see our blessings until we have lost them.

Teach us, Holy Spirit, to see more clearly. To live more fully. To love more selflessly.

Teach us to count our blessings – even in the valleys.

Teach us to have grateful hearts – even when things are hard.

Teach us to hope in possibilities – even when we face dead ends.

Teach us to love – even when we don’t feel loved or loveable.

Because when things change, we will hope for another season, another day, another chance to say “I love you”, “I’m sorry”, “This is worth fighting for”, “You are amazing”, “We are blessed” or “I forgive you”. Help us, no matter where we are, to live with this banner in our hearts and over our lives…

“Praise you, God – you are always good – even now!”